As I waited (and waited) for Max and Paga to de-board the Eagle, and while Vivi slept peacefully for two hours in the back seat, I listen intently to the radio program This American Life which was airing a program on Life After Death. The man's voice I heard speaking over the waves was alluring and haunting. I instantly liked him. The way he slowly narrated his story was riveting and I completely empathized with him. His voice was calm and his thoughts about grief were daringly introspective. But what was most intense and moving to me were the tiniest of details that he remembered about how he felt, what others said to him, what he did in the days and weeks after the accident, and how it's disturbed him ever after. This true story of an accidental vehicular death is by Darin Strauss. I can't find much on the internet about it... wait I found this one entry by Darin by way of the google god and someone else named Jimmy Liew.

Here's the written blurb from the radio : Everyone told Darin Strauss that there would have been no way to avoid hitting the bicyclist who swerved into the path of his car. When the girl died, the police said Darin wasn't at fault. Darin tells the story of what it's like to live with being the accidental cause of someone's death.

Listen to the program. I'll never forget it.

Someone who falls asleep at the wheel knows what they can do to prevent future accidents. Innocent drivers, Hickling says, realize they’re at the mercy of the universe. —Edward J Hickling (who wrote the book Overcoming the Trauma of Your Motor Vehicle Accident)

It’s hard to learn so viscerally that the universe is managed with indifference, by chance. — Darin Strauss